Last week I was talking to some friends about how since we've become mothers, our standards on somethings has gone down. House cleaning was the main topic, but it really got me thinking. So much has changed since I had Jeremiah. Thing that were important, aren't any more.
When I first started staying home I thought my house had to be immaculate at all times. I thought that's what it meant to be a home-maker, to be a Stepford Wife. Always look perfect, have the perfect house and the perfect family. That was more do-able when Jeremiah was awake maybe 4 hours a day, and I could put him on the floor and know he would stay there. That's not the case any more! I have a very high energy boy who loves playing outside and with people. He's at such a fun age now! He really wants to play and interact. I would much rather be doing that then cleaning toilets! So honestly, that's what I do. I keep my house neat and clean. But I'm not worried about my toilets any more.
Cleanliness seems to be a theme on my lowering standards. I used to always shower and wash and dry my hair. Then I would go through the motions of styling it and doing my makeup. Now my goal it to wash my hair at least every other day. Don't worry, I still shower every day... Well, most days. :-) Anyways! I'm not so wrapped up on how I look. Yesterday I need to go by Hobby Lobby. I went in jean shorts an old Belhaven shirt and no makeup. That was fine with me. I jut didn't care. I went from always having to be totally together to kind of back to college days, run the brush through my hair, wash my face, brush my teeth and I'm good to go!
This is true with Jeremiah. When we go out I make sure he's not dirty and that he has clothes on. We spend a lot of time in shirts and clothe diapers when around the house. I would much rather have a child who is wearing something that doesn't quite match but is content and sweet natured then a child who is fussing but in a really cute outfit. Yes, if you're wondering, I'll probably be one of "those moms" who lets her little boy where dress up clothes to the grocery store. :-)
There are some things that are more important to me. I have become much more aware of the language people use around me. I've always noticed when people would swear or use God's name disrespectfully. Now I'm hyper aware! It's one thing to say those kinds of things around adults, but kids, come on now! I don't want Jeremiah hear those words. Especially when he's trying to imitate everything we say. He's such a sponge right now, just absorbing everything. More then most would give him credit for.
Money. I don't think it's that it's become more or less important to me. I'm have a new perspective on it on. After a lot of tears and pray, we decided it was more important that I be home. Disclaimer: I think there is nothing wrong with mom working out of the home. I know several women who do work out of the home and are incredible mothers. I know for some, there's no option, both parents have to work out of the home. I'm thankful that God has allowed for me to stay home.
I'm not going to lie, it was hard going from two incomes to one and I had to make some big changes on how we spent our money. We used to go out to eat a lot. We still go out, but not to the degree we used to. I used to go to the grocery store and buy whatever we wanted. Now I clip coupons and buy what's on sale. Money is important. It's what enables us to pay our mortgage and all the other bills. Things that we HAVE to do. But we don't have to have tons of it to be happy or even content. I have more funny spending the weekend at our house, playing outside or at the pool and then curling up on the couch with Matt to watch a movie then if we had gone out. All things that don't cost a thing. Like I said, just a change in perspective.
I know there are many other ways my priorities have changed. These are just a few. What about you? What changes have you noticed since having kids?