Friday, January 27, 2012

Even more so

When I was a teenager the main family I would  babysa\it for had three kids. The oldest was Megan, then D.J. and Zack was the youngest. Before I would start sitting for a family I would always go over to visit to get a feel for the family.

While I was visiting with Ms. Kathy, the mom, she told me "Little boys are different. But D.J.... He's even more so." She told me lots of moms had told her that, even moms of other little boy. I didn't fully understand what she meant. Then I started sitting for them. D.J. wasn't a bad kid be any means! He was just full of energy, extremely curious, loud, so sweet and maybe a little mischievous.

Sound like another little boy I know. My very own, Jeremiah!

I have had other moms tell me the same thing Ms. Kathy was told about D.J. "Little boys are different. But Jeremiah... He's even more so."

It's taken me a little while to come to grips with what this mean.

Honestly, at first, it made me judged. Jeremiah loves to run, yell and be wild. I would see looks from other parents like I couldn't control my child. So I would try to get Jeremiah to behave the way other people thought he should. It just made things so much more stressful. He didn't understand why he couldn't play or explore and would become frustrated. Which just made him louder. The result would be more looks and cycle would continue.

Then I became defensive. Who are these other moms? What do they know about my son? i was ready for a smack down. Not a good thing to be prepared for.

I was left struggling, Trying to figure out what to do.

Over Christmas Matt's uncle and aunt were so encouraging! They just really praised Jeremiah for his energy, his curiosity, sweetness, and even the loudness and mischievousness! They shared that one of their kids was the same way, and he outgrew it!.

After the encouragement, lots of prayer and talking to Matt, I now have a plan! I'm not going to try to force Jeremiah into a box that other people think he should be in. I'm going to let him run, yell and play. I'll be there right there with him running, yelling and playing. Showing him that he's loved and isn't expected to change. Teaching him that it's good to want to explore and even be wild in the right setting. How to control himself. Even harness his curiosity and apply it.


Kierstyn said...

I came to your blog for a recipe, and instead was blessed to read this post. You are so smart! It's a blessing to see how you're growing a momma.

I think one of the things that you faced was something every parent has to face. The expectations you have of your child, and the reality that is your child. Rather than fighting the reality, you're doing a great job embracing the reality, but still keeping Jeremiah in line with the guidelines in scripture. You're doing a great job being realistic in your expectations of him, holding him accountable to the Word, and letting the rest go.

The lesson I was reminded of? Learn what battles to fight, and only fight battles you can win.

Keep up the good work, Momma!!

M. Johnston said...

Ditto! I was going to comment're doing a great job and valuing the eternal or the temporal. How'd you get so smart?

Megan said...

Thanks guys! It's always nice to get encouragement, especially after sharing where I've been struggling. The fact that it’s from to parents that I greatly respect helps.

Daddy: The grace of God! And some good examples. :-)